As I Xi It v2.3

Hmn… It’s been a while since I’ve blogged. There are quite a few things to add.

Tetris for the iPad was 69p today (I know, I’m a big spender) so I figured, ‘Why not?’

I still have my bulky, old Nintendo Gameboy and it still works! The only game I really ever played on it was Tetris. Unfortunately, the iOS Tetris doesn’t have the classic theme tune!! It’d be cool if had a Gameboy classic mode emulating the original.

The joys of being a 90's kid

For the last couple of years, if I’m still awake in the wee hours, I can hear an alarm go off at 04:24. At first I thought it was an old digital watch, but in my recent room clear out, I found what I thought was the offending article but the battery had died. Just now, I heard the beeping go off at 04:24 again. Whatever it is, it must have a pretty low power consumption to still be tormenting me at 04:24.

It’s a bit of a conundrum.

Usually, around this time, for the last couple of years anyway, I’d review the year just gone.

I have fuck all to say about 2011.

A few weeks ago, I was shopping in Costco with mum and on the way out, I noticed a girl in SMB uniform. It’s been eight years and I’m still here, still shopping in Costco with mum, still buying those jumbo frankfurters I’m so fond of.

Time for a change in scenery.

Simply put, I’m not completely happy with life at the moment. Yes, I know that my life could be worse, a lot worse. I could be a starving child in rural Africa not knowing when my next meal would be and have lost all my family due to famine, genocide or illegal diamond mining, but I’m not. I’m living quite comfortably in my middle-class suburban neighbourhood in a first world country (you wouldn’t be able to guess that from the state of The Tube, but I digress), with the means to pop down to Sainsbury’s for whatever my stomach desires and have a plethora of people who care about me. While I appreciate the things I have and the people around me, I’m still not satisfied because I have no job. Money isn’t the main issue, god knows I have more than enough things as it is, it’s the fact that I feel unwanted and don’t have a purpose in life.

I suspect it’s almost like having dementia but with a heightened awareness that your mind is going to pot. I’ve had a fairly privileged education, went to public school for the majority of my formative years followed by a couple of years at a world class university. In amongst all that, there were the internships and work experiences. There’s a lot of information in that squishy grey matter encased in my cranium but it’s not really being used to it’s full potential and I don’t like that.

With every day that passes, I feel like my brain cells are atrophying from lack of use. Although I’m reading a lot, it’s all a bit passive, nothing is being practically used at the moment. I was reading Silent Spring the other night and several things popped up in my mind with regards to the Water Framework Directive and REACH but I couldn’t remember them in any great detail. Had I been reading it a few years ago, I’d be able to knock off a mini essay about each directive without much effort. In the end, I resorted to looking them up on my iPhone. As fond as I am of my iPhone, it can’t replace my brain.

I dunno, maybe I’m just greedy. Maybe I should just blow my money gallivanting around the world and then kill myself. I’d rather meet an untimely demise while climbing Everest or cage-less shark diving than end up in a nursing home, unable to control my bowel movements in forty-fifty years time.

Sometimes, you have to buy smaller things receptacles so that you can downsize your collection of things into it.

Hmn, I seem to have spotted another crevice which has managed to avoid decluttering…until now.

I dunno what it is, but music seems to evoke more memories, feelings, dreams than movies do. It’s almost as if the lack of visual stimuli hones all the other senses.

I caught myself having the most un-me thought this afternoon. While waiting around for mum, I thought to myself, “If I were a smoker, this would be where I’d pop out for a ciggy”.

Apart from a very brief flutter of teenage experimentation, I’m not a smoker.

Odd.

Oh eBay, you’ll allow scalpels to be sold but not Swiss Army Knives? Where will I get rid of my spares now?!